First Round Over -

Point for me. Round 1 over. Drummer boy steps back and looses lead in an embarrassing way.

My elaborate prank consisted of facebooking drummer boys closest friend here and then suggesting the idea that we wear t shirts with insulting phrases meant to embarrass him after he takes the stage.

We spent two or three days toying with different themed statements and in the end the result was:

Pretty boy friend: The drummer is a he-she

Close friend: The drummer smells like cats

Me: The drummer turned me on to women

When his band got on and when they took a minute for the singer to welcome the crowd (very small turn-out) we stepped up one by one. Everyone laughed and so did he.

His reaction after their set was finished: That was brilliant!

As the night went on; the topic amongst everyone except him was how much he likes me and that I should make the first move because he's really shy.

Apparently ever since he's met me he's been talking about me non-stop to his close friend. He also has a friend over from back home visiting for five days and she totally spotted it. My friend that was with me kept telling me he's so into you.

So now I know for sure he does like me.

His close friend kept urging me to make the first move. To just grab him and say it.

I have to be honest, as forward as I am in general, and as much as I like him, I thought that going through the effort of setting up this prank would surely give it away.

Instead he spent all night avoiding me like the plague. He wouldn't stand beside me for more than five minutes and everything everyone said to me sounded like it was not true and I was a bit heartbroken by the time 11 pm rolled around.

At which point, I decided I had call it a night and go home. So as I turned to leave, his close friend grabbed me and said "darling you're wonderful; he's just like that"

and I said "I'm going to go home, get over it, and cut him off as of tomorrow. I need to know a guy is willing to step up for me and I don't think he is. I'm better than that. Let him know he's an idiot."

"I let him know that everyday. But please stay in touch"

"I will. I will. Don't worry. I'll be over this in no time"

I grabbed some subway on the way home and ate it and went to bed and could not sleep till about 2 am.

The entire time I kept thinking about it and about how hard its going to be to not talk to him for a while until I can go back to seeing him as a friend.

I also kept thinking that I am very mad. I went through all that effort for nothing and I probably look like a fool now. To which I said to myself; you did something very nice for someone and he enjoyed it. That should be the reward. Do not expect something back when you do something nice for someone. So that's what I've told myself and I don't feel like much of a fool anymore.

I do feel like I'm a bit heartbroken.

I dreamt about him last night for the first time too.

In my dream, we were at my house in Canada. He'd come over and when my sister sat down to meet him; she started talking about children in general and how much she loved them. He got up and stormed out saying things I couldn't understand.

I turned to my sister and I said, who told you to talk about kids with him. To which she said; better to know now than later.

Then he came back saying things like I'm sorry and I didn't mean it and other crap. I was very mad and I said : I don't have time to waste on a guy that won't appreciate who I am and what I am worth to which he said he does.

End of dream.

I mention this dream, because my subconscious always processes things when I'm sleeping and they always bubble up to the top. This was one of them.

I now see that he's scared of a commitment. To which I say your issue not mine. I won't try to chase him out of it or convince him of otherwise.

One thing I have learnt from this is that if I try really hard I don't have to be so worried about rejection and I am definitely a better person for opening up this time around and letting myself be seen for who I am.

I'm just not quite sure how I'm going to avoid him and not appear mad because I kind of am.

Give it sometime I suppose but I don't think I will want to talk to him before a whole 3 or 4 weeks have passed.

Thanks Buj and posh and sealife for the words of advice.

X